OMG... Really?!?

Pantry in Flux

here i go, starting slow (no, i did not mean to rhyme, but it happens, time-to-time).  i decided that the best thing to do was ease up on full on grain mill domination and expressing my own oil--gonna have to work my way up to that--and go with the basics.  so, i decided to stop into Williams-Sonoma on Friday to buy a food grinder attachment for my KitchenAid, some curing salt (a very soothing pink color) and some tellicherry peppercorns. then, yesterday, my older son went with me to browse through a farmer's market for great tomatoes, beautiful peaches, some well-deserved white onions (and, okay, a few cupcakes for my sons... and, yes, they are for my sons) and i felt pretty good.  then on to Super Target (no, not just Target... this one's SUPER) where i got some sugar, cereal, a juicer (on sale, mind you), and some spices--i'm making corned beef, pastrami and bacon from scratch and you would not believe how hard it is to find the things for that at one store, especially in meat country here.  then over to Henhouse (that's a market, for those who don't know) where i loaded up on bread flour, unbleached all-purpose flour,  dried beans (not all the ones i needed, but a couple), some produce, and staples to help me get some smoking and things going.  then on to Costco (i... love... Costco... oy!) where i grabbed huge slabs of meat, salmon, nuts, dried fruit and fresh fruit for some other things i'm planning.  THEN to Price Chopper (another grocery store, just so's ya know)  where i grabbed some more stuff then got home, unloaded all, sat down and looked at it all with this feeling in the pit of my stomach that was very much like a leadball surrounded with fire.  i was full of excitement and dread. "what the hell am i doing?"  "i can't wait to get started."  "ooh, let's move this here and that there so i can rework my kitchen to make it the perfect working space."  "i can't believe I'M DOING THIS!"  "i LOVE that i'm doing this!"  yeah, schizophrenic shit like that.  i am a bit taken aback by the different stores i need to go to in order to find the things i need in my pantry for this.  i find myself comparing what my shopping experience would have been in Los Angeles if i still lived there.  i don't mean to diss where i live now, not at all.  it's simply that my mind is a little boggled that i can't find all of these things in one store or, at least, not spread out across four or five.  i still need juniper berries, a ham, a turkey, pork belly to make my bacon (there's a butcher i go to that should have it, so i'm pretty excited about making my way over there to grab that, because i can not WAIT to make bacon for my kids from scratch), AN 8000 SQUARE FOOT KITCHEN AND AN UNLIMITED BUDGET, but, for now, i'll start with what i have.

Mango Mania for Juicing and Baking

The Country Store aka My Kitchen

i keep waiting for this to seem like a good idea in theory, but not in actual execution.  after all, i've been known to start things i don't finish, although i try very hard to keep that to a minimum since having children (now teenagers).  however, i don't want to lie to myself or give myself a hard time if, a day here or a day there, i fall prey to my schedule or life and need to grab something ready-made off the shelves.  and i will, of course, share those little mishaps as well.  but i look at my vast collection of cookbooks and feel pretty good about my choice.  i won't run out of ways to make exciting meals for my kiddles or finding different ways to jazz up their lunches or our lives.  food is a wonder, this unbelievable gift that bonds like nothing i know.  my sons and i come together and sit at the table every night, sending a collective sigh out of all of us at the end of the day.  sometimes, we eat too late, because of crazy schedules, it's true, but, well, i don't like us eating on different schedules.  there's only so much longer i'll be able to spend this time with my kids in this way before they're off to college, their own lives, their own families.  it's part of why i want to make things from scratch, now.  i want them to feel the love i have for them in every bite.  i need them to know they are my knights in shining armor and that i thank them.  and, so, i take a deep breath, look at my kitchen and put it together to begin my journey into scratchness.

The Storm Before the Calm

A from-scratch chef (center) in the making

the kitchen, for me, has always been the coolest place in the house.  since i was a kid, it was in here that i felt most at home.  taking on the challenge of making everything from scratch simply feels like an extension of that all encompassing, bonding way of being with food and family i have always known.  like my mother before me, i like to think i've got a well-stocked kitchen and pantry, but i don't really kid myself that i have everything i need for something like this.  as i begin to prepare for my foray into the world of homemade, i walked through my kitchen and really looked at what i had on hand.  to give you an idea of what made me think of why i would need just the basic kind of stuff, here's what my worktop holds on it::


2-standing KitchenAid mixers
1-electric breadmaker
1-blender
1-food processor
1-mortar and pestle
1-molcajete
1-comal
1-tortilla press
1-hand crank pasta maker


and, so, i figured that all i would need to really get started were just a few basics i didn't have--like a grain mill/meat grinding attachment for my mixers (as well as sausage maker), a good scale, some good storage stuff, whole grains for grinding, stuff like that.  then, as i really started my research and devotion to this, i started really looking.  let me just say, i found the absolute BEST website for all of the stuff it turns out i'm missing to accomplish my quest.  it's called Pleasant Hill Grain which is at http://www.pleasanthillgrain.com/ and has just about everything my little heart could desire for what i'm looking to do.  i was on this website for about 2 hours last night, just browsing, writing down costs, and coveting every freakin' thing i was seeing.  i tallied up all i would need to have a fully functional from scratch kitchen, what i would need to augment what i already had, and here's what it looked like:
Grain Mill (the one i would love to get) $491.80 (it also grinds meat, veggies, beans, and makes sausages, so that takes care of a multitude of sins, but there's another one for $159.99 and, let's not forget, KitchenAid Mixer attachments could do the same thing)
Meat Grinder $99.99 (again, KitchenAid attachment)
Juicer & Oil Press $329.99 (which, of course, reminded me that if i said "scratch" that would also mean pressing my own freakin' oil, right?)
Storage Buckets with lids - between $5.99-9.99 each (of course, the wheat and grains i was looking at on the site also came in their own hermetically sealed buckets, so maybe i didn't need these 'cept, of course, i'd need somewhere to put all of that flour i had just ground, right?  'cept, again, i have flour canisters all over the place, so maybe not)
Pasta Machine attachments from $12.99 for a wooden drying rack to $20.95 for a ravioli attachment (although, i'm a big girl, i can cut my own ravioli, thanks)
Grains/rice/beans ranging from $55.00 for a big ol' bucket of goodness to $104.90 for the same (just different grain/rice or bean)
so, really, out of all of this, the things i need most are the KitchenAid attachments, the juicer & oil press, and, of course, these buckets o' grain.  that would start me off at a minimum of $465.  not including the food i'd need to buy to support this as well.
that is not helping my quest to shove it to the economy as much as i'd hoped, although, how can you start something like this without a bit of investment for the right stuff so it succeeds?  (i think my little animated devil on my left shoulder has tied a gag over my angel's mouth, cuz he's all i'm hearing--in a really cool Barry White voice, too... weird...)

My Boxador, Moon, is waiting patiently for me to begin

yeah, well, i'm gonna start it slow.  next week, i'll grab the mixer attachments and order some grain.  preferably some durum, hard white wheat and hard red.  then i'll walk through my kitchen in awe at what i've decided and begin.

Don't Get Mad, Get Cooking

the economy isn't cooperating.  shocking, isn't it?  and it's really irritating, too.  truly.  here i am, wanting to save my money to buy a car, put children through college (someday), and put together a nice nest egg for my little family, but the financial health of the country is not playing nicely with my plans.  so, i've been looking for ways to cut corners without cutting the quality of our lives.  i figure, i can cook pretty much anything i put my mind to (or, okay, i'm willing to try) and i could really be helping us all out by doing things from scratch, save money that way.  i already make my own bread, jam and pasta sauce.  we don't buy packaged cookies or desserts (bake 'em), and, for the most part, i make all of our salad dressings. but i got to looking through my pantry and fridge and it made me think.  i buy sauces, spices, spice mixes, soups, and more and i realized, maybe, i could make EVERYTHING from scratch.  mayo, ketchup, salsa, spice mixes (curry powder, five spice powder), sodas, juices, ice cream (which i do make, but not all the time)--as i mentioned, every freakin' thing.  i talked about it with my sons and after they looked at me like a was a little crazy, they got into it and are all about  it.  so am i.  and we're gonna do it.  starting september 1, our family is going to take a year and devote our cooking to everything from scratch and keep a running tally on cost, how much we may (or may not) be saving, recipes, the time involved, and the adventures of doing this in the modern world while juggling a full-time job during the day, a full-time job at night, two kids, two dogs and two rabbits.  uh, huh... you bet.

thus begins our homemade journey.  i hope you come along for the ride.